Look what I did! (You should too): A story about social media, peer pressure, and approval.

Are you unconsciously influenced by what
you see on social media?

Recent national events have created a flurry of social media activity. From the election and the associated fervor on both sides to Superstorm Sandy; millions of pictures have been sent, tweets were flying a mile a minute and who was behind them? Survey says: Us.

The need to be first or to fulfill our own need for approval from others is explored a bit further in a recent article from Forbes' Jeff Bercovci. In a witty read, he discusses the various stages of approval seeking and how by the nature of the media itself, it is impossible to have someone notice something you're proud of unless you put it out there. He also discusses the type of peer pressure created by the good deeds of others as well as, pressure created to tell people you did something good.

  

I want to take this idea a step further this week. We've all heard the echoes of our parents voices when we read, 'If your friend jumps off a bridge, should you?' It's a universally used example to deter kids from buckling to peer pressure.

On social media, when you see that your friend likes something, or in Bercovici's example; voted, or has an opinion on a current event, or is ranting about the blown call in the closing moments of the game; does it make you feel like you should do the same?

Does it motivate you to speak out on topics you normally would generally have no business giving your opinion on?

My first instinct is to say, 'No. I don’t.'  But, maybe I do and I just don’t notice?

When I see people post a picture of their kids, do I subconsciously follow?  When someone posts a poignant news story, I re-post it sometimes, and yes, if someone posts that they donated to a charity, or helped someone less fortunate, I have looked into that charity or researched a situation.

Let's take it a step further.  Should companies use social media to promote their own philanthropy or practice philanthropy for the sake of doing good in the community and egging others on to do the same? Is their cyber-bragging wrong because they are a company? Should they wait for someone else to recognize their efforts or, should they tell the world to promote a positive message and goodwill outside their main line of business?

Should we wait for someone else to promote positive messages about us or what we've done, or, should we bask in an introspective satisfaction that we've done something positive in the world?

Social media causes us to seek responses.  By nature we as humans generally want approval, confirmation that we are good people with a purpose, so it seems natural that we would post about positive things we think and do. The confirmation from our friends further fuels the desire for more positive attention. It’s a never-ending cycle, but not necessarily a bad one.

What do you think? (You can let me know here, on Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, Google+, etc.)

Josh Kaplan writes on various subjects including management, information technology breakthroughs, healthcare IT recruitment and innovations, big data, IT staffing and recruitment, and technical news and trends.

Words Matter: The importance of semantics in business.

Choosing the right words make or break a conversation.

There’s a distinct difference between wording something poorly mid-speech or mid-conversation and choosing the wrong words to manage and motivate.

Making a gaffe during a speech will happen to you (if you indeed do find yourself giving speeches).  It might even become a memorable part of the speech or conversation despite your protests and embarrassment.  Just chalk it up to your growing 'binder full of gaffes.'

Carefully chosen wording used to manage and motivate, however, can be instrumental in getting the best results from others. The right word choices can make all the difference when trying to elicit positive outcomes and feelings from an employee, in a meeting, during a review, or any other interaction; be it in a business or a personal setting.

Saying, 'How might we…?'; as in this LinkedIn posting from IDEO's CEO Tim Brown; is a perfect example of combining three important words into a synergistic powerhouse of verbiage can generate positive and creative results.

In IT staffing, words are an integral part of how we match candidates and clients. We ask clients what they truly want in a candidate beyond the job description. In addition to covering the skills, projects and jobs listed on their resume/CV, we ask candidates more about what they want from their career; we ask what they would like to take away from this project or how they would handle a situation that the client has told us might come up. Comparing and contrasting the client and candidate responses to these carefully selected 'word strings' can be the key to mutually positive outcome for all of us involved in the process.

Some other positive outcome provoking strings include:

• 'I really appreciate…'
• 'Tell me more…'
• 'Yes we / you can…'
• 'What do you think?'
• 'How would you handle…?'
• 'Please elaborate on …'
• 'How do you feel about…?'
• 'What's your take on…?'
• 'What can we do about…?'

I am sure there are thousands of other powerful and efficient phrases out there that can be the catalyst for a positive conversation or outcome when interacting with others. If you have some gems you use to inspire, spur collaboration, praise, or motivate, I'd certainly like to hear them. Feel free to comment or drop me a line.

Josh Kaplan writes on various subjects including management, information technology breakthroughs, healthcare IT recruitment and innovations, big data, IT staffing and recruitment, and technical industry news and trends.